Gospel Singer Pillows

tell it on the mountain

Non-Denominational Carols

The-Lead-Us-Not-Into Temptations

Applause

'Father, meet Sister Kate, she shimmies like a jelly upon a jelly plate.'

'It helps with reception.'

The worship singer suspects someone doesn't appreciate his talent after finding his mic muted for the 3rd time.

Shortly after being accepted into John's heart, Jesus lodged in aorta.

Walking on Water

'...And for those of you who cant remember the words...'

Thomas Dorsey.

"Please select hymn number 637 on your i-pods."

'Today's sermon is on the Gospel according to old Saint Matt....'

The First Supper

"Yeah, he changed water into wine but it was nothing you'd want to lay down."

"Uh-oh! Here comes trouble!"

'Amen will do ... You don't need to do the wave.'

"Go and spread the Gospel. Hide it in colorful, little eggs for the world to find and be delighted by."

Religious man watching religious TV

Priest reads sign above fire extinguisher that says: 'In case of quenchable fire, break glass'.

Revisionist Theology Happy Hour in Galilee with Jesus and Judas

'Talking about Jesus is NOT name-dropping!'

"I'm sorry Gary, but my twelve apostles are enough. We don't also need a mascot."

'This next song is one I wrote before I souled out.'

The Teachings of Jesus: Day 1

'The pipe organ costs a hundred and ten thousand. Four music stands for Ed's Gospel Quartet, eighty five fifty. Discussion.'

'You called for tech support?'

'Here's the story of the sermon on the mount.'

"Wine?! Laddie, he'll have my attention when he can change water into Scotch!"

'Today's sermon is on the Gospel according to old Saint Matt....'