Gospel Music Gifts

"Okay, who's singing 'How great thou Arrrrrrrrt?"

The-Lead-Us-Not-Into Temptations

"Please select hymn number 637 on your i-pods."

Thomas Dorsey.

tell it on the mountain

"Today we studied Matthew, the first in a four-part series."

The worship singer suspects someone doesn't appreciate his talent after finding his mic muted for the 3rd time.

Golf

Walking on Water

'Amen will do ... You don't need to do the wave.'

'Today's sermon is on the Gospel according to old Saint Matt....'

The First Supper

"Uh-oh! Here comes trouble!"

"Yeah, he changed water into wine but it was nothing you'd want to lay down."

Moses conducts the Red Sea orchestra.

"Go and spread the Gospel. Hide it in colorful, little eggs for the world to find and be delighted by."

Religious man watching religious TV

Revisionist Theology Happy Hour in Galilee with Jesus and Judas

Priest reads sign above fire extinguisher that says: 'In case of quenchable fire, break glass'.

The Teachings of Jesus: Day 1

"I'm sorry Gary, but my twelve apostles are enough. We don't also need a mascot."

'Talking about Jesus is NOT name-dropping!'

'The pipe organ costs a hundred and ten thousand. Four music stands for Ed's Gospel Quartet, eighty five fifty. Discussion.'

"Matthew, Mark, Luke, Peter. John you are out of order again."

'You called for tech support?'

'Here's the story of the sermon on the mount.'

Jesus always enjoyed a day on the water fishing.

'Today's sermon is on the Gospel according to old Saint Matt....'

"No, a question period will not follow!"

"Look, Mary, it's the wee three kings!"

Jesus was banned from all future fishing tournaments

'I know he's got a bum report card when he comes in singing 'Nearer my God to Thee'.'

'Today's sermon is on the Gospel according to old Saint Matt....'

The Post-Resurrection Years.

"Woah! I haven't read it yet. Spoilers!"