Good Vs Evil Explorers T-Shirts

"Buzz off, Fly-boy. We don't need more accessories."

"You're fired."

"I still haven't decided if I want to be unemployed as an English major or as a Communications major."

"It's Dr. Sadie. Go ahead, caller." "Yeah, how come you haven't said 'Merry Christmas' yet?" "Oh, that’s because I was hoping to provoke everyone who’s upset about the so-called 'war on Christmas' to spend all their time on hold waiting to castigate me. That way, all the normal people who don’t think Christmas is just another chance to play the victim can open their gifts in peace." "You're welcome, America." "Why haven't you played 'Jingle Bells' yet?"

'How much stuff can I get away with and still go to heaven?'

"Damnit—Every game ends in stalemate."

"If you want my opinion you're damned if you do and damned if you don't."

Assault weapons go over the cliff.

"And for a left-handed designated hitter and a player to be named later, Mr. Steinbrenner would gladly fly Elián home."

I don't know if neuronal stem cells can or cannot become blood cells but one thing is for sure, neuronal stem cells can become controversial.

Evolution of God. . .

"The 'Ex' huh?"

Angel and devil versions of a man prepare for a shoot out.

Profiles in Courage

'It was a split decision.'

Jihadi Art Critics Circle

"Your brochure led me to believe it'd have a more temperate climate."

Devil paints God.

Professor in time machine at the end of a battle "Damn watch!"

The shadow

'But what if you're a masochist...?'

Just as Dirk was about to escape on horseback, the magician's final spell turned his swift black steed into the legendary Bureaucratic Night Mare.

Face Trophies

"You can make your own mistakes when you can hire your own lawyer."

Mother with Child.

"What's caused the recent increase in radio listening?"

"What did I say about serving Angel food cake?"

Genetically modified climbers: 'Quick, aren't they?'

"The results are meaningless, but it gets the animal-rights people off our backs."

"I've looked under 'good', 'old boy', and 'good old boy' and you're not here."

Vietnam and abortion atrocities.

'Don't worry, son. They'll find a way to win. They always do.'

Statue of limitations

'National Association of Ethicists meets here, 7 P.M.: Please watch your purse and wallet.'

Lost & Found, Angel and Devil