Golf Humor Gifts

'I don't think there's any hope for my golf game.'

Donald Trump Playing Golf With Hair On Fire

"No, not yet."

"It's hard to say if your game is improving, but that's definitely the first divot-in-one I've ever seen."

It is best dealt with by the 'Pitch and Run Shot'.

Caddie brings his golfer a shovel in the sand trap.

Golfer to other: 'I've never seen anyone slice a putt before.'

Helicopter dropping golf balls onto a green.

"Okay...just this once...but no more practice swings!"

'I read that the ball is on the surface of the club for just 0.00035 of a second, so even when you take 100 shots to go around, you are only getting less than 1 second of golf for your money...'

Hole in forty-seven.

'Wait! Better give me the big one.'

Golf Score Reducer

Golf Hil Divot

'If you want to improve your golf score, the best wood to use is a pencil with an eraser.'

Dieter Miller veloped the talking golf ball to call out when lost in the rough. But... (ouch, ouch, ouch)

"I enjoy the game so much more since they invented the self-driving ball!"

Golf Myth #293--Ball Washer

Tiger Woods, on his way to his 1st golf tournament.

"I've never seen a gimme taken on a fareway before."

'One of the quickest ways to meet people is to pick up the wrong ball.'

'Have you got a sand wedge?'

"In this situation, I'd suggest a 5-word sentence with an action verb but hold the exclamation mark."

'I know Joe's sight isn't all that but the captain's not going to like it.'

Poor Walt - they don't make em like him anymore.

'My name is John and I'm a golfaholic!'

'I remember Rod when he used to strike footballs into the crowd!'

Mulligan's first mulligan.

TOLD YOU TO TAKE LESSONS FROM GOLF PRO

"... And how much am I bid for this set of, John McEnroe's golf clubs?"

For a $50 payoff, Dwayne would agree not to follow a foursome around all 18 holes.

Meditating on a 4th for golf!

'I'll be with you in a minute.'

'Tell me the truth,Rodney - you've moved the hole haven't you!'

'Keep playing like that and you'll strike oil!'