Golf Enthusiast Humor Gifts

'Lunge out of the water and slap his face!? ... Oh, that's real effective, Leonard.'

Donald Trump Playing Golf With Hair On Fire

Caddie brings his golfer a shovel in the sand trap.

It is best dealt with by the 'Pitch and Run Shot'.

Golfer to other: 'I've never seen anyone slice a putt before.'

'I'm not quitting! Who knows if i'll ever get another chance to break a hundred!'

'I don't think there's any hope for my golf game.'

Helicopter dropping golf balls onto a green.

"Okay...just this once...but no more practice swings!"

"Ralph - you'd play better golf if you had your eyes checked."

'I read that the ball is on the surface of the club for just 0.00035 of a second, so even when you take 100 shots to go around, you are only getting less than 1 second of golf for your money...'

'Wait! Better give me the big one.'

Golf Score Reducer

Golf Hil Divot

'If you want to improve your golf score, the best wood to use is a pencil with an eraser.'

Dieter Miller veloped the talking golf ball to call out when lost in the rough. But... (ouch, ouch, ouch)

"I enjoy the game so much more since they invented the self-driving ball!"

"I've never seen a gimme taken on a fareway before."

'Have you got a sand wedge?'

Tiger Woods, on his way to his 1st golf tournament.

'One of the quickest ways to meet people is to pick up the wrong ball.'

Golf Myth #293--Ball Washer

"In this situation, I'd suggest a 5-word sentence with an action verb but hold the exclamation mark."

"Well, yeah, Doc, I twisted my back a little...but it was the longest golf shot I've ever made!"

'I remember Rod when he used to strike footballs into the crowd!'

'I know Joe's sight isn't all that but the captain's not going to like it.'

Poor Walt - they don't make em like him anymore.

Mulligan's first mulligan.

"... And how much am I bid for this set of, John McEnroe's golf clubs?"

TOLD YOU TO TAKE LESSONS FROM GOLF PRO

For a $50 payoff, Dwayne would agree not to follow a foursome around all 18 holes.

'I'll be with you in a minute.'

Meditating on a 4th for golf!

'Hmmm...I think I've figured out why you're slicing...'

'Tell me the truth,Rodney - you've moved the hole haven't you!'