Golf Gigglers Pillows

"What are you looking at, four eyes?"

"Remember when we used to wonder if there other beings somewhere out there?"

It turns out they don't go together so well,

"Perhaps more people would give heed unto the word of the Lord if the Lord had a funny blog."

Road rage on a mobility scooter.

"It said on the packet the pasta should act as a vehicle for the sauce."

'These are my 'golfing socks'... there's a hole in one!'

'Oh yeah? Well I'm not crazy about your humming, either!'

"You ghosts are pretty cool. I wish I could be more like you..."

"Oh, don't mind us. We boo everybody."

'It's my first attempt at gardening but so far I've learned...'

"I'll need a three iron."

"Where do you see yourself in five years."

"I'll have the crescent-crab 'purses' and the smoked duck 'hash' – hold the quotation marks."

"How much of this stuff can I eat before it can no longer be returned?"

'If you want to improve your golf score, the best wood to use is a pencil with an eraser.'

'If we had any guts we'd get out of here!'

'Personal?...No, I assure you, my relationship with God is strictly professional.'

The First Supper

Nicky Clarke sheep shearer

"Honest Dad, I was going to mow the lawn... But I can't find the lawnmower in here!"

Ghost Playing Cello

'Now THAT'S just showing off!'

Smite Golfer or Cow?

'Remind me again. . . who's chasing who?'

'He's definitely not a top flite.'

'Too many gaspers kept the turtlers from catching the ridley.'

"Lady!!! Could we turn down the A.C.?!"

Teenager ghost tantrums - "I hate you! I wish I was alive!"

'It's one of your five a day.'

'What did it mean, 'til death do us part?''

'Our company drone found you on the golf course yesterday after you called in sick.'

Tombstones have names of vegetables on them.

"It's downward dog. . . says his back is killing him."