Golf Comic Enthusiast Gifts

"That's not a divot so much as a major geological event."

It is best dealt with by the 'Pitch and Run Shot'.

'I'm not quitting! Who knows if i'll ever get another chance to break a hundred!'

Helicopter dropping golf balls onto a green.

"Okay...just this once...but no more practice swings!"

"Ralph - you'd play better golf if you had your eyes checked."

'I read that the ball is on the surface of the club for just 0.00035 of a second, so even when you take 100 shots to go around, you are only getting less than 1 second of golf for your money...'

Hole in forty-seven.

'Wait! Better give me the big one.'

Golf Score Reducer

'Well done, Evan; you only missed a hole-in-one by 7 strokes.'

Golf Hil Divot

"I can't tell if Ed is taking a long time to line up his shot... Or if he fell asleep again!"

'If you want to improve your golf score, the best wood to use is a pencil with an eraser.'

"I enjoy the game so much more since they invented the self-driving ball!"

Dieter Miller veloped the talking golf ball to call out when lost in the rough. But... (ouch, ouch, ouch)

'What's this filed under G?'

'One of the quickest ways to meet people is to pick up the wrong ball.'

Golf Myth #293--Ball Washer

Tiger Woods, on his way to his 1st golf tournament.

"In this situation, I'd suggest a 5-word sentence with an action verb but hold the exclamation mark."

"I've never seen a gimme taken on a fareway before."

"Well, yeah, Doc, I twisted my back a little...but it was the longest golf shot I've ever made!"

'My name is John and I'm a golfaholic!'

'I know Joe's sight isn't all that but the captain's not going to like it.'

I never realized what a bad golfer I was until somebody else kept score. Club House.

'I remember Rod when he used to strike footballs into the crowd!'

"... And how much am I bid for this set of, John McEnroe's golf clubs?"

For a $50 payoff, Dwayne would agree not to follow a foursome around all 18 holes.

"One More Swing."

'I'll be with you in a minute.'

Mulligan's first mulligan.

TOLD YOU TO TAKE LESSONS FROM GOLF PRO

'Hmmm...I think I've figured out why you're slicing...'

'Keep playing like that and you'll strike oil!'