Golden Jokers Pillows

"You wish I was making kissy sounds! My walker needs oiling!"

Cloning Dept. Ooh! She's got your eyes and nose, mouth...

'So far I've found out the doctor had something to do with it.'

'Here comes your Daddy - Do you want me to do the talking?'

Photobooth Photobomb

'Who put Grandad's teeth in the aquarium?'

The Return of the Germ

'In a slight change to the programme, the second year jazz quartet aren't playing 'Hello Dolly'. They are however playing truant!'

'Either it's a mistake, or this town's gone soft on crime.'

"You were ho-ho-hoing in your sleep again!"

'Look...it's almost empty! Those pesky birds need to quit stealin' the food out of this squirrel feeder!'

Santa entering a pool for a swim

'I'd like a puppy who's cute, playful, and can shoulder a lot of blame.'

Santa School.

"Honest, D-D-Dad. My report card's 'in the cloud.'"

"Mom said we're old enough to take care of you, so this is our new chain of command!"

'So that's where I left my car keys!'

'You say you saw my client do it. OK, but what if the jury doesn't believe you? Try to think outside the witness box.'

'And make sure you use the AUTOMATED teller, you old goat!'

Autumn Only $5 Per Bag

"Is our fish fresh? Sure it is! My dad is just delivering the latest catch..."

Modern animal communication

'Now that we've got a new bull, is he the calf's stepfather?'

The Jury Decides.

You know you're middle aged...

'As to my clients guilt... let me be perfectly vague.'

"It was 'im wot ruffled me bonce, judge, as I was politely getting into 'is car."

"You BOTH have the asshole gene?"

'Why did Tarzan name his chimp cheetah?'