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"Er...now what did I come up here for?"

"I understand the revisionists are hot on your trail, Professor Delauney."

'Good news from the field, sire! Attila did not like the referee's call, so he's folding up his tents, taking his ball and going home!'

"Dangnabit, Wilson! Where's that big campfire I asked for?"

'Thank goodness he's gone through sensitivity training.'

"I'm not an intern, I'm a squire. I'm not an intern, I'm a squire..."

'And your class story is an old, old one. In the middle of successful soul-snatching careers you were suddenly bitten by the lawyering bug...'

Visual Gag: Dracula reading a Fang Shui book. The Vampires version of 'Feng' Shui

'I'm quite impressed with your bloodthirstiness but we won't be able to offer you health benefits eternally.'

Pioneers of the ancient west

"I know winter gets ugly, but this is ridiculous!"

'Count Dracula, I wish you'd come to me sooner...'

The Headless Horseman claims his luggage.

'You don't look anything like Count Dracula and I should know, because he's a personal friend of mine.'

Finally - Prof. Brozinski found the vegetarian vampire! And he knew what to do...

And where do you think you may have come in contact with AIDS tainted blood?

"Drop it... Such things banished in our kingdom."

"But now it won't stay in mint condition."

Fresh Blood In Politics

"They're remaking the old 'Dracula' film again..."

Can't Count Dracula

'Dracula's First Day of School.'

'I like to start my day with a cup of Joe.'

"Good King Worcestershire looked out on the feast of Stephen..."

Mermaids

Weak Knights

Nosferatu-D2

"Why are you always the last one in the office? You never go home before it's dark."

Vampire Weekday

'You really should Floss.'

'What do you want to drink?' - 'Bloody Mary.'

'Not more bloody holiday brochures.'

Count Dracula's biggest pet peeve: waking up with "coffin head".

Parsifal

'The lemon ice cream is delicious. What about yours?'