Gluttonous Giggles Pillows

A spoiled boy eating dinner.

"Hey, dad. We wanna play army before we go to bed. Can we have our toy medals back?"

"I remember his last words were, 'Another bite and I'll burst!'..."

"The recipe said to let the chicken rest after it comes out of the oven!"

"No thanks, I'm stuffed."

'For a small extra charge, we can provide a specially-formulated digestive enzyme.'

"I've combined a laxative and alphabet soup. I call it 'Letter Rip!'"

"It's not the paranormal activity that bothers me so much as the passive aggression."

"Yeah, my life flashed before my eyes!...OK, it was food - all the food I've ever eaten flashed before my eyes."

"I might just get a pie."

'It was this big. I swear'

..and with our new spirit website you can keep in touch with all your dead friends!

'Tomato ketchup?' 'Well you wanted the house red.'

"Yes, he is a celebrity chef, but he doesn't have any opinions on Iraq."

Looking at belt - "One more notch, room for desert."

'Where do you want to go for breakfast, fancy an Australian or do you want to nip over to Hawaii?'

"What would you recommend pairing with the school of cod fish?"

"Like you, I'm a bit of a glutton, but I need to monitor my food intake otherwise I could be too heavy to fly..."

'Would that be rare, or medium rare?'

"There's a caterpillar in my food."

"The insect menu is very popular nowadays."

Dog orders the food 9 out of 10 dogs prefer.

God asks an angel for change for a tower viewer.

Alarming symptoms after eating boiled beef and gooseberry pie

"That's what we look like naked??"

"Chicken on a bend of spinach and onions?"

"Just a heads-up, the Mushroom and Crab Risotto doesn't like its photo taken."

"Relax sir, I'm sure chef barely remembers you posting a negative review online."

"Boy, I get booed everytime I perform here."

'... we've got a crowd of, oh I'd say fourteen million organisms here for the annual 'Salmonella potato salad bowl'!'

"Leave room for sex."

"This artificial flavouring doesn't taste like artificial flavouring."

Vegetarian restaurant: 'Two vegetarians please.'

'What's your favourite meal?' 'Seconds.'

"I have four stomachs and one of them always seems to be hungry.''