Globe-trotting Vet Gifts

'A man called about a 'cow down in the Sudan...'

'This model is hard to get parts for.'

The Family Joules: Part 5

"Arr, we found your luggage, Captain."

'She knew we'd try to talk her-out of it.'

Chief Foreign Policy Advisor to President Obama.

Notice to travelers: 'Delayed' is the New 'on time'.

The Family Joules: Part 7

The Family Joules: Part 8

"It hurts when I warble."

'If this is a non-stop flight, how do we get off?'

"Where in the world can we bore people senseless about this year?"

Tourist

'We don't have a GPS or any maps, so this is the best I could do.'

"Please remember to check for any personal problems you may have left behind."

'And this is the small print in your travel insurance...'

'Which vacation destination do you prefer: a country where Americans are feared, idolized, envied or hated? Or shall we just let that be a surpriese?'

"Doctor Finkelstein is here to ensure you're not carrying any excess emotional baggage on board."

'Second rumenotomy on that danged cow this year, Doc....'

The world toilet.

Thousands of customers stranded when major travel firm goes out of business.

'Luggage is luggage, sir -- just try to be happy with what you've got.'

"The reason why U.S. time is behind English time is because England was discovered first..."

'A cruise by air, sir, is called a 'tour'.'

An Easter Island statue with a camera (showing how tourism affects the destinations of the tourists).

"I thought that we were going to eat something exotic tonight - not just a traditional English meal."

"My job traveled abroad, so I can't."

'I like to relax before my business flights.'

Welcome to my banquet, everybody! You'll find the China in my Far East and there's a New Dehli over in India. You'll then find Chile in South America and Turkey over by the Mediterranean. And do I see the gravy next to Turkey? No, that's just Greece. Ugh! I think I'm losing my appetite. In that case, go over to Eastern Europe and you'll get Hungary.

'We had an all-inclusive-holiday. Bad weather, lousy food, arrogant waiters, crappy hotel and outrageous prices - all that was included.'

Two men with different globes, modern man is running on the globe.

'Yes, our cruises allow travellers to choose from several viruses...I mean, ports of call.'

Bogga Springs - Twinned with Geneva

"That's what comes from being a multinational. The company picnic will be in Terra del Fuego."

"The good news is we're sending you overseas for this feature."