Girlfriend's Parents Gifts

'Whatever you do, don't stare at my father's glass eye.'

"I'd like to impress my girlfriend's parents."

'I know why Max has suddenly turned vegetarian: His new girlfriend is a Fruit-Bat...'

"Please excuse, Tom, Mom and Dad! He's worked the last ten years in a large city hospital and has no practice with chit chat!"

Shepherd and eurydice

'I sent out for everything.'

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

City Zoo: Day Care

"Bond James, Bond."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

Butterfly Woman

You're my Mona Lisa.

Gender Equality

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

Grace For Flies

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

I like the Jets...I guess

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

'Are you finished eating yet, sweetie?...Guess that answers THAT question!'

LAY ZEE FUK

"Talk nerdy to me."

"We've made great progress!"

"They grow up so fast."

"This is a great spot to practice mighty roars son..."

Madonna of the Pukes.

"Stephen and I are today's special."

"Someone once told me that kids grow up so quickly. I hope there's some truth to that."

It's a Whole Field of Paisley!