Gimmick Gardening Enthusiast Gifts

For the new gardener.

Man cutting hedge next to two heads impaled on sticks. Signs beneath say 'You missed a bit' and 'You can do mine next'.

The Phantom Of The Garden

'Ah, now's there's something different....'

Frontispiece to the Artists' Catalogue.

Mowing the Bottle-Garden

'I ask you, Larry the Landscaper, did you ever, under any circumstances, promise anyone a rose garden?'

"Gnomeschooling is harder than I thought!"

'Every summer, dandelions can't wait to go topless!'

Square Yard

Adam and eve do their laundry,

Skyscrapers.

"Your cholesterol level is through the roof!! When you die, may I hang you up in my garden for the blue tits..?"

Clown watering houseplant.

"Now, that's how you know you're in the garden of bird lovers: They've installed a Spa, not just a bird-bath..."

Xmas wrapping paper blower.

The garden of Bedlam

'You've never planted potatoes before, have you?'

"Drawing blood again?"

Leaf Blower Showdown.

Hairdresser pruning a vegetable (colour).

"My paw's getting tired. Is your paw getting tired?"

Flower pot tries to escape to the next balcony.

That a garden gnome had Pebbles in a headlock did not horrify Ms. Otis nearly as much as her neighbor's very poor taste in lawn decor.

Football Fan

'Can't you take 'em down the recycle centre like everybody else?'

"I searched for a garden gnome on Amazon and he's been following me ever since.'"

"It seems that a flower is just a weed in drag!"

Gordon suspected the garden gnome didn't like him.

Mouse and garden magazine

Volunteer

'A few over here, please.'

Cat watering catnip.