Gift Of Gabber Gifts

'Special Delivery!'

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

'Complete sentences?? Jeez, how verbose can you get?'

'He attained Nirvana in two weeks? - he's GOTTA be using steroids!'

Little girl hoses down walkway as Santa slips and falls

Clown Cheering Up Patient.

"He won't eat anything but corn."

'Hey, mac, is this your idea of glasnost?'

'Don't you love the clean, fresh smell of the morning air?'

I conduct comprehensive surveys - I ask my girlfriend.

"Sure I can't pop that in a bag for you, sir?"

Joke Shop product - Not Funny After 10 Sept 87

'Once a donzel, the dyvour now settled for orts.'

'Well, you make it sound silly. All my new hybriproducts are unique and useful.'

Undertaker with 'light', 'done', and 'RIP' settings on his toaster.

"You must see someone about your problem."

Toe-Tickling Machine

Dentist Suction

'Seriously, Earl, if you say you've got a bone to pick with me one more time, I'm out of here.'

Salesman sees house with a HUGE doggy door.

The Emporer's Clothes Boutique

The Paper Silhouette Editor

Header: Franchising of Optometry Caption: 'With every new pair of glasses you get a cheap plastic toy of a character from the latest kids movie'

Outhouse on Cliff.

'This milk smells funny.'

'HEY,no Tongue!'

Dentist reading 'Dentistry for Dummies'.

"Let's not spoil it by keeping score."

OJ Simpson - Pop Up If I Did It (Here's how it happened).

Sock drawer.