Gift-giver At Heart Pillows

'Next Father's day I'll buy you a tie instead of stealing a Ferrari.'

"Remember when we talked about how you send mixed messages. . ."

Tipping Pain Chart

This year Mike decides to make his own Valentine's cards.

'I gotta bad feeling about this.'

'You brought gold? I thought we agreed to a twenty dollar limit?'

"Will you only promise the children toys that can be brought at this store?"

Christmas Dwarves

'Last week I got a lovely watch for my wife!'

'I hope you came with a receipt.'

"...And don't forget to include the receipts!"

"I'm going to need to make multiple stops."

'I like going to parties - invited or not.'

'Just what I wanted. Not!'

"I'm not sure she really liked our gift. She used just two exclamation points after 'Thanks'."

'Year after year I play Santa, and I still don't know how to give.'

'My holiday season: A rich tradition of belated giving and premature babbling.'

Sweet potatoes...

'We're giving you one big present for your birthday and Christmas.'

'I didn't take you literally when you said you were helping the little people.'

"He's your rich uncle. What do you buy the caveman who's hunted and gathered everything?"

'If you can't think of anything nice to say, how about a gift certificate?'

"For Christmas you got me a roll of wrapping paper? And you wrapped it?"

Flowers - "You got anything that says I put a lot of thought into this gift."

"If you're looking for something more expensive we can always raise the price?"

Nothing Personal: Gifts for your business adversaries.

The wedding-day - first anniversary.

Mall Directory asks, Where's your Christmas Spirit.

I THINK when OXFAM suggested you buy a goat for Xmas...They meant for the third world!

"Shopping vouchers? Is that all you got him?"

'Don't be silly, I like my sweaters a little big.'

Roo felt a little cheated with his new Christmas present.

"It's a gift for the tooth fairy so I used dental floss instead of ribbon."

'The next time you buy a tie for me, get one that doesn't look like a beef steak!'

'Gold!! You bought Gold!! What about our agreed upon gift price limit?'