Giant Veggie Grower Gifts

Paul was certain he had the largest pumpkin, until he discovered he was the smallest man.

'Well, once it's won the prize for Biggest Marrow I shall expect you to replace my fence!'

Prize vegetables.

'We use to tiptoe through the tulips. . . now we just waddle through the weeds.'

Don't mind us. We're just trying to eat more locally grown food.

"I'm rooting for the carrots."

'Looks like Reginald wasn't kidding when he said he's going to start urban farming on the roof...'

"Son, you can't get blood from a turnip!"

"Just a couple of ninety cent seed packets, and you can have fresh garden vegetables for heaven knows how long."

Excellent crop! What's your secret?

Jeff realised it was probably time to discontinue his subscription to 'Office Plant of the Month'.

'Good morning pumpkin.' 'Good morning treasure.' A pile of treasure saying 'good morning' to a pumpkin

'You're still keen on organic gardening then!'

Typical...the weather is lousy all week...then on the weekend it's too sunny to work.

'You certainly went to town growing all that lettuce so I've dressed for dinner.'

'That GMO gene salesman was darn right!'

Show and Tell.

"Whoever dug up my carrots had better learn to play dead, fast."

So those are your 'weapons of mass destruction? - Slugs?

'You've never planted potatoes before have you?'

'It's amazing how many recipes you can find with courgettes in them when you have to'

'That chap really knows his onions!'

'They send you into the ketchup department? HA! I'M going into pizza!'

"Looks like someone forget her lunch today."

"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious day when you're ripe and not yet mealy?"

'Apart from Charlie here, I don't have any problems with slugs'

"So I can eat better here at work."

'Oh, not much. Well, still dabbling a bit in commodities futures.'

'And this is the secret of how our company gets through hard times: we grow all our own food!'

Hydroponic Gardening

'I say it's spinach and the heck with it!'

'This pea is the first vegetable that I've ever grown so I would like to have it stuffed and mounted.'

"What the hell's going on here ... ?"

Gardener of the Year.

'Their main complaint seems to be the brussel sprouts.'