Germophobe Funster Pillows

Coronavirus Etiquette

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

"That's odd. I visited an antibacterial soap website, and my computer got a virus."

The new normal

Two people in hazmat suits lie in bed

'Let me guess...it's contagious!'

'Gesundheit.'

Superbug Research Go For It / Got it

"No Hand Sanitiser"

"Geoffrey's a bit worried about lyme disease."

'I hope what I have isn't catching.'

Wash your hands

'I cause sneezes.' 'I cause fever' 'I cause that 'I don't know- I just don't feel too good' feeling.'

"Hey!-This looks like a good place!"

"Well, okay I'll eat it. But, only if you have a medical team on stand by."

ABC Vice Company: Employees Must Squash Hands Before Returning to Work

"We're gonna make, Rose! Keep washing your hands!"

Soap Versus Coronavirus

A mosquito cleaning the surface of a person's arm before sucking out the blood.

"The penicillin looks good."

'...and I'm telling you that Budgie sneezed!!'

'That stuff kills 98% of household germs, but leaves the remaining 2% limping around enough to maintain your resistance.'

'We've got a new DNA database...'

Shaking hands will transfer bacteria

'I know it's not around too much this season but I think I have swine flu!'

'Colds! Sore throats! Flue! Did anyone ever tell you you're a hypochondriac?'

"Aways the victim."

"Gesundheit!"

Yellow Fever: What you may catch if your painter sneezes.

'I'm afraid you've got a computer virus.'

"Hypochondriac's handbook. A little passion project I'm working on;, or, rather, I would be working on."

"Think it can last 20 seconds this time?"

'No, you haven't missed much. Pretty well everyone called in sick.'

"No, I'm not able to transplant your computer's antivirus software into your body. Try washing your hands more often."