Germaphobe Delighter Gifts

Hazmat suit

The Cougher

"That's odd. I visited an antibacterial soap website, and my computer got a virus."

The new normal

Two people in hazmat suits lie in bed

'Let me guess...it's contagious!'

'Gesundheit.'

Superbug Research Go For It / Got it

Wash your hands

"No Hand Sanitiser"

'I cause sneezes.' 'I cause fever' 'I cause that 'I don't know- I just don't feel too good' feeling.'

'I hope what I have isn't catching.'

"Hey!-This looks like a good place!"

"We're gonna make, Rose! Keep washing your hands!"

ABC Vice Company: Employees Must Squash Hands Before Returning to Work

Soap Versus Coronavirus

'We've got a new DNA database...'

'That stuff kills 98% of household germs, but leaves the remaining 2% limping around enough to maintain your resistance.'

"Maybe a little inconvenient, but not a single case of the flu in the entire office."

Want to hear a secret? Every time they put a nut in my mouth, I give it a little lick.

"Aways the victim."

"Why don't I start you off with the contact information of everyone who's read those menus over the last 14 days?"

"Hypochondriac's handbook. A little passion project I'm working on;, or, rather, I would be working on."

Zika Epidemic

Shaking hands will transfer bacteria

'I'm afraid you've got a computer virus.'

"Think it can last 20 seconds this time?"

'No, you haven't missed much. Pretty well everyone called in sick.'

"No, I'm not able to transplant your computer's antivirus software into your body. Try washing your hands more often."

"I could probably keep spring-cleaning till next winter."

"Ouch!... That hand sanitiser is a bit feisty..."

'If I keep bringing diseases home from school, maybe I shouldn't go to school.'

'Quit being a baby- go see doctor Brown, and let him shoot you full of something!'

"Rex doesn't shake. He's a bit of a germaphobe."

"We might be in trouble – the environment people have cited us as a hazardous waste site."