Germ Consciousness Guru Pillows

The New Promiscuous

'Why do I have to cover my mouth when I sneeze? After all, we're just making liver.'

Disease Management

Film Festival. Events. Screenings. Ernie attends these festivals in costume. He's gone over to the dork side!

'It finally took me thirty years, but I finally have one of every 3-D comic book ever made'

'Hi, this is Batman. You've reached the Batcave. I'm not in right now but as soon as I return I'll call you bat.'

Veggie Hall of Fame.

"These new variants are triggering my impostor syndrome."

'That new antibiotic seems to be working. Time to evolve again.'

"That new antibiotic seems to be working. Time to evolve again."

"We'll see how it goes. It's Santa's first year with the genetically modified deer."

Until Bob entered her life, Lisa never even knew the meaning of the phrase 'acute multiple drug-resistant infection by transgenic Staphylococcus aureus.

"You emptied your mind already? That was quick."

"This is great. I've been playing miniature golf so often I almost forgot what regular-sized golf is like."

"Your right.. It is waving back at us."

'Oh, I dunno. hat would you like to evolve into?'

'Louis Pasteur, after discovering that microbes transmitted disease, experimented with methods for killing them'

'He's one of those genetically-altered antibodies.'

Cartoon computer

'We are parasites, but I think we also have parasites.'

"Cheer up, might never happen!"

'Mr McGregor's growing genetically modified carrots!'

"We're using genetic engineering to modify the molecular structure of a plant's natural cellulose. We convert selected parts of the plant into plastic!"

"I'm not feeling well. I'm picking up a few things at my pharmacy."

'Hey! It's way too early to declare me, 'Nerd of the Century'!'

'Hold everything - we just discovered a newer flu virus.'

"Finally, a co-worker who CAN handle Big data!"

John Snow

'Here's something I'd like to do... microbiology!'

Genetic engineering - mutant DNA escaping from a laboratory.

'This has to be the longest course I've ever played!' (Sign with Gas/Food/Lodging Next Tee)

"He's a phony - made of all those new fat substitutes."

Rule #1. Of what? HYPOCHONDRIACS HANDBOOK. A little passion project I'm working on; or, rather, I would be working on. I can't write or type wearing my protective anti-flu gear. Rule #1: Get some loser to take dictation for you. I hate where this is heading.

The Last Jerseys.

You say genetically modified po-tay-to. I say genetically modified po-tah-to.