Genetics Fan Gifts

'It's your mother. You're being recalled for the correction of a minor defect.'

'We can genetically alter any pet to fit your needs.'

'The stand-up geneticist'

Birds family

'The circle is complete!'

Figures from 'Ascent of Man' diagram all do the Conga: 'Let's all fo the Conga, na-na-na-na ...'

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

'Everybody has to change to compete.'

'If I told you what I wished for, you'd probably slap me.'

'Oh dear. He's got my eyes.'

Wonders of Evolution: This species has developed an unusual protective shell.

'I think we're losing sight of out roots.'

Homo Zapiens

"It'll take three wishes to get less cream cheese on your bagels in New York."

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

''Science moves but slowly, slowly, creeping on from point to point'. Tennyson.'

"Actually, not all roses are red. Sometimes they're white as well as numerous other colours. Also I think you'll find that violets are sort of purple..."

"No son of mine is going into entomology."

'A geneticist laid bare my genetic blueprint, and I feel violated.'

When it comes to health issues, I'd rather listen to a physician than a spin doctor.

'That's interesting -- I seem to have discovered the gene that makes people want to become geneticists.'

Uncle Mort, have you been playing with your home genetic engineering kit again? Guilty. I was trying to clone my own DNA. For laughs, I mixed up my genes with compost. Mixed up? Technically, cross-bred. Trump is a meathead! Well, you're a vegetable.

"I'm going to be rich, famous, and irresistible to the opposite sex any day now, Randy." "I think you've had one too many hot cocas, little buddy." "No, really. I've written a note for my descendants and buried it in a time capsule in my backyard." "Once they read it, they'll time-travel back to the 20th century and genetically engineer my embryonic self." "They'll bestow me with superhuman charisma, epic good looks, and money-management skills." "You're forgetting that to have descend

'Max really likes those genetic markers.'

Mother: 'He has your eyes.'

'Ahhh . . . he's got your original nose.'

"But I don't have any wishes related to food or squirrels."

'He's making tremendous progress. last week he had three tails.'

"To meet the girl of your dreams, swipe right on the lamp."

Museum of Anthropology. Did Neanderthals carry backpacks?

'Happy New Ear!'

"She introduces herself as Drosophila Melanogaster, but everyone knows she's just a common fruit fly."

The Beginning of Nostalgia

'Sometimes I wonder how things would have turned out, if I'd gotten Mom's eyes and Dad's hair.'

"I don't know whether we should keep it a secret or call the world press!?"