Genetic Jester Pillows

"Nobody's perfect, but we're working on it."

'If you don't behave we'll unfreeze your stem cells!'

'Hey, half my chromosomes are YOURS, you know.'

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

Don't be fooled by the theatrics. She'll only suck your sap!

Password Error: Snow White and the seven dwarfs not recognised as eight characters.

'Say low-cholesterol dairy-free alternative to cheese!'

Hardware and software

'To make up for the decline in snail mail deliveries, I've taken to biting my master every time he gets an e-mail.'

Bad Interview Technique

"It says here that study claims chimps and humans are 96% the same. What's your thoughts Derek?"

"The incessant chatter was driving me crackers, so I got him his own twitter account."

'Phone for help? Are you mad? Have you any idea how much it costs to use a mobile abroad?'

One of Many California Gene Pools

"My Twitter account isn't too interesting. It's mostly just a bunch of threats."

"What if it's smarter than us?"

Man Tries Use Telescope In Observatory As Cannon.

"Hi, I'm the new IT-security-expert! Where is your server room? I want to see if I can overcome your firewall!"

"I only have two apps on my phone. One makes me spend all my money and the other gives me embezzling tips."

"Actually, they all look alike to me."

How DNA molecules combine.

If this plutonium should start to roam,box it's ears and sent it home.

Cloning...Oops! Oxelot.

Genetic Research Institute - "Darling we were made for each other."

Finish Annual IOK Grunion Run

"It's terminal? Brill, I was worried my YouTube channel was loosing it edge."

"Let's just say that you're not trending on any site on the internet!"

Texting Rodeo Clown

Mr. Science Times

Cyber crime.

"Here, try this anti-dandruff fertiliser my gardener recommended."

Computer clown.

"You BOTH have the asshole gene?"

Cow Printer

A sink with one faucet is labeled 'H2' and the other labeled '0'.