Genetic Counselor Gifts

Sperm donors - "They couldn't tell me anything about my genetic father apart from the fact that he was a frequent donor!"

'Congratulations! It's a saviour sibling.'

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

'As a beginning teacher, you know you come here prepared to teach and become a good teacher. As you gain experience, you will learn that you also come here to care and become a great teacher.'

"It's no my fault I got a D. The system is broken."

Jr. cloning kit

'Come on, you can make it work! You're supposed to be Lovebirds after all...'

I'm getting ready to apply for college. Do you have a list of party schools?

'Well, he definitely has his father's... Er... Eyes.'

'In general, do the right thing.'

"Seminary didn't prepare me for this."

Yes, I agree that man is a master of his own destiny but sometimes it helps if you pass algebra.

'So, what do you want to be when you grow up: rebel scum or loyal servant of the supreme android republic?'

'I wish his guidance counselor spent more time on college plans and less time suggesting names for his band.'

"Perkins! What have you gone and done now...??"

A backup plan might be a good idea, in case 'being a celebrity' doesn't work out...

'ADN'

'Of course creative writing is important. You want to write home for money when you go away to college,don't you?'

'Darling, we were made for each other.'

'If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, looks like a duck, it' actually a gene-modified flounder.'

'It's better than we expected. Now the sheep produce wool in the winter and cotton in the summer.'

'The Algenist meets the Alchemist.'

"The extent of your extracurricular activities in high school, may very well be participation in regular program of oral hygiene using an effective decay preventaative tooth paste, but that won't get you into a good university."

'At least hanging around street corners reminds us we're at a crossroads in our lives.'

'Of course he reminds you of yourself at his age -- he's your clone.'

Now this is Dr. Brainstorm, he's trying to breed a moth that will eat synthetics.

"I don't know about you, but I don't like being a high school guidance counselor."

Gene Manipulation

'I thought I'd put in the details later.'

'He looks a bit like both of you.'

"I hope there's nothing genetically modified in this."

Snakecharming.

"It's really hard to make any plans. By the time we grow up there will be all new jobs that nobody's ever heard of!"