Generation Junkie Gifts

"I think that's why they call it the 'baby boomer' generation."

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

"Good" "Bad" "Work on it" "Keep working - maybe it's not as bad as you think it is" "Put it to a committee" "Give up" "Make it worse" "Make it better" "Still a bad idea" "Overthink it" "Throw yourself into a pit of wild badgers" "Throw it away" "Call it done" "Sigh."

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

Homo Gamus

'Now that's what I call a kebab... a skewer with whole pies!'

'I'm designing a robot that'll do my drafting homework for me,'

Addicted to Facebook...lost internet connection.

Fast Food Menu Selections

"Has anyone else noticed that the efficiency experts seem a little robotic?"

Nutrition-Free Diet

'Kudos to Bill for the cotton candy machine idea!'

"Wait -- I have an app that creates a napkin to write the contract terms on."

"But but ... if we remove all the additives there'll be nothing left!"

The proper term for our special promotion is Triple Cheeseburger with a Gazillion fries...not the triple bypass special!

'The next big thing is ultra nano.'

'You're not retaining water. You're retaining cookies and ice cream and pizza...'

'I hunt and I gather. I invented multitasking.'

Exit. My problem is restaurants have drive-throughs, and fitness centers don't.

'You'll love this, it has no nutritional value.'

"So, gentlemen.... By investing in this time vortex manipulator, we will be able to cross the bridges before we come to them."

Uncle Mort, have you been playing with your home genetic engineering kit again? Guilty. I was trying to clone my own DNA. For laughs, I mixed up my genes with compost. Mixed up? Technically, cross-bred. Trump is a meathead! Well, you're a vegetable.

'Sorry, you're overqualified for this job.'

"It's a combination of pizza and sushi and taco and egg roll and...it's just something everyone loves."

"Actually, I worked my way up from ideas and you can too!"

Internet Cafe

"This is genius, Ted. We can't use it. Nobody will believe I thought of it."

'Bacon-butties are my favourite!'

'So that's his secret.'

'Hey! I've just had a great idea! How about a light bulb...?'

"So that's a triple burger with added cheese and relish... Would you like the complementary angioplasty with that?"

"I'm from the Noble Prize committee. You're on to something big, but it's been done."

"It's time to get the couch gutters cleaned again."

End of summer fantasy vs. end of summer reality.

'At least he's honest.'