Gene Genealogy Geek Pillows

"I'm afraid we can't insure you Mr Smith. It appears you carry the gene for insurance fraud"

Gifts for a cloned baby!

'Take it from me and come back. The future is definitely on land.'

'It's really more of a family forest than a family tree.'

On a hot day in 1941, scientists uncovered the only known remains of the elusive nerdosaurus rex,

"Something's wrong with the broccoli. Please take it back to the kitchen and have it genetically modified."

'I hope you like this, dear. I got the recipe from Gordon Ramses, latest cookery hieroglyphics.'

Several generations live together in Cuba

Eurydice is bitten by a snake

Family DNA

'You never met my father? Never mind, I'm turning into him!'

"His name is James Tom Dave Jon Lee Robert Glenn Joseph Tony Sam Barnes. We didn't want to hurt any relatives' feelings by not naming him after them."

"Could you tell me how to get to cedar grove, New Jersey? I want to see where my grandfather was born."

Welsh airport arrivals.

Macbeth: Take Two

'The suspense is killing us. Which one is our grandchild?'

'He's got your nose.'

"...We've traced your lineage all the way back to a 15th-century East European Count."

"Hear ye! Hear ye! Look, having nuclear - my uncle was a great professor and scientist and engineer, Dr. John Trump at M.I.T. - good genes, very good genes, O.K., very smart. . ."

Gene Therapy

'Friends, lab rats, country mice, lend me your ears...'

Frankenstein's Ancestry

"That's lovely darling, but I don't think that's what your teacher meant when she asked you to draw your family tree..."

Genetic Fingerprinting.

'Eureka! I found the gene that causes people to sell low and buy high!'

Send us $2.00, and we'll send you Your Family Tree

"You get your hair from your father's side..."

Well, I'll be...Dutch Elm Disease!

Ideas that failed: Goliath Goats.

Preparing for Casual Friday at the Genome Lab

"Ma didn't want to leave out anyone."

'Darling, we were made for each other.'