Gender Role Debunker Pillows

"Do you have a book on jobs men are best at?"

"Now there's a relationship that's working!"

There were a million things Alexander Hamilton hadn't done

“I don’t mind doing the dishes every night—it gives me time to deepen my resentment.”

"If you get to be a stay-at-home dad, why can't I be a stay-at-home daughter?"

Corporate Punishment.

"Oh, my husband is a great provider: his hunting success rate is close to 30%..."

"In our little socioeconomic group, I've always taken care of the socio and John's done the economic."

Pregnant couple: I'm so glad I'm a woman/I'm so glad I'm a man.

'This is me at my most masculine.'

'She hunts, she brings it back, and my manhood,thank goodness, remains intact.'

"There's no way God ever intended man to shove a pillow into a pillowcase!"

"Always a bridesmaid..."

Gender Symbols

'Typical male: Too proud to ask for directions or take advice! Look at us now!'

"He must be very secure in his masculinity."

A shared passion

"Should I wait till the tail stops wagging before I stick it with my fork?"

"Back from hunting with nothing again?"

"The long and the short of it, doctor, is that I'm ready to change from a soccer mom to a Nascar dad."

It's an unwritten law. Guys can like only two kinds of flowering plants - a cactus with thorns or that one that eats flies.

"Being a lazy slob is part of my identity. Keep on nagging and I'll report you to our diversity officer!"

"Darling, sorry to bother you, but the steak won't fit into the toaster..."

"Excuse me! It's 'personflu' if you don't mind!"

"How about once in a while you stay home and warm the nest, and I'll forage for grubs and worms!"

Climbing Beard

"Yeah, getting Ol' Spike neutered wasn't enough. So, I changed his name to Percy and enrolled him in Doggy Ballet."

"If it please the court, I'd like to act as my own plucky young female attorney."

Regendering Christmas

Sign in yard says 'It's a Tomboy!'

'My mother works very hard all day, and doesn't like to spend her evenings coping with laundry.'

Women are from venus...men are from a layby outside Watford.

"Hey! If you're gonna use the ladies tee that skirt goes below the knees. And lose the tank top, mister."

"He's about my height but he doesn't have my build."

"You do realise, when I come into a room, I don't always do vacuuming."