Gender-bending Humorist Pillows

"Is that my skirt?!!"

"Try picking up a girl after you've renounced everything."

The Female Brain and The Other One

"Good lord, Billingsworth. You've stumbled onto the legendary Lepidopterist Graveyard."

Horse takes its owner for a walk.

"If there is a heaven, why do we end up as fossil fuel?"

"I think, therefore I am depressed."

'... And I'd like to thank my agent and everyone who voted for me... '

A dead Olive found stabbed, in a Cocktail drink

Plant Closed - Downsized Too Far

Med. Soc Sec. Can we agree on anything to reduce the deficit other than a bake sale?

Boldly going where no man has gone before.

Bird using a human finger for a fountain pen.

"Check this out! Abracadabra!"

'Want a good read Sex, violence, incest, murder Old Testament.'

"We walked him a lot when he was a puppy. . . now he walks us."

'Hey, he's just some guy from the neighborhood -- and you know what Chicago neighborhoods are like!'

"Actually - he's rather your 'Me, Jane ' sort of boy!"

'Really, this award has come as a great surprise...'

"Employees bound to their employer by desperation and fear of unemployment. Now THAT'S my idea of a union!"

'Could you give me big tits?'

"You left your goddam car in the driveway again!"

"I could not believe it, there he was, attacking me: I thought knights were supposed to protect ladies..."

Ladies of the Creation! - No. X - Miss Brown takes her cousin out fishing,

'I don't know. . . Nobody has ever requested a doggy bag before. . .'

Genetically Modified Apples

"Well I hope this one lasts longer than last year's."

"To think this all began with letting Autocomplete finish our sentences."

"You do realise, when I come into a room, I don't always do vacuuming."

"Based on blood tests and the X-ray, I'd say it's 'a guy thing'."

"First, let me say how much I appreciate your 6-foot social distancing."

Witch Rowing Team

No Smoking Building.

A man and dog are tied to parking meters.

'I suppose it would be ok as a little runaround for the wife...'