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"Can you make me look like Wolverine?"

The Age of Reptiles. . .

"I've put on a few ounces, but it's mostly paperweight."

Oh yeh? Well at least he doesn't get fleas.

"I feel a great disturbance in The Force."

Dr. Frankenstein creates his newest monster, Frankenmime.

"I knew we should have gotten the shorter tree."

With the aid of a tactical dictionary, and was finally able to make sense of what the salesman was saying.

I love Museum Shops

'Yes, it's just a little volume.'

'Is your cabbage diet working darling?'

Wind turbine and leaf blower.

"Every abductee gets a souvenir mug."

"Teenagers! Everyone try to look cool!"

Never give a cow a giant straw.

It became increasingly difficult for the captain to reward his crew and still maintain his ferocious reputation.

'You should work for Conglomo. You're allowed the vegetable of your choice.'

'I mean, what sort of thief only takes a dog bowl?'

"And when the extended warranty kicks in, we send you a big can of new car smell."

Captain Ahab (Ret.)

'Are you going exploring or retrieving a duck?'

Good stripper cop / Bad stripper cop

'Brand X, the wine for those with indiscriminate taste.'

Shaman reads magazine entitled 'Witch Doctor'.

'There's a little bit of my late husband in every glass - I used his ashes as a fining agent.'

'We only have one brand of beer, but we've got six kinds of flavor straws.'

"Other than going ahead and back an hour at daylight savings, professor, can your time machine travel to any other period in time?"

Emergency Underpants

Toast kidnapper.

Young Geeks.