Humorous Gift Fan Gifts

Every Easter the chickens would play the same old joke on Farmer Brown

The Age of Reptiles. . .

'Ugh Look The whole garden is just one giant cat toilet'

"I've put on a few ounces, but it's mostly paperweight."

Blind man walking a tortoise.

Oh yeh? Well at least he doesn't get fleas.

Dr. Frankenstein creates his newest monster, Frankenmime.

'Ya gotta love the way this farmer gets into Halloween spirit.'

'Yes, it's just a little volume.'

"I knew we should have gotten the shorter tree."

Wind turbine and leaf blower.

'Is your cabbage diet working darling?'

"Teenagers! Everyone try to look cool!"

"Captain, we've taken on strippers."

"Every abductee gets a souvenir mug."

Never give a cow a giant straw.

It became increasingly difficult for the captain to reward his crew and still maintain his ferocious reputation.

'You should work for Conglomo. You're allowed the vegetable of your choice.'

'I mean, what sort of thief only takes a dog bowl?'

Captain Ahab (Ret.)

'Are you going exploring or retrieving a duck?'

"And when the extended warranty kicks in, we send you a big can of new car smell."

'There's a little bit of my late husband in every glass - I used his ashes as a fining agent.'

Shaman reads magazine entitled 'Witch Doctor'.

Good stripper cop / Bad stripper cop

'Brand X, the wine for those with indiscriminate taste.'

Emergency Underpants

'We only have one brand of beer, but we've got six kinds of flavor straws.'

Toast kidnapper.

'The Ugoola's wheel is bigger than ours!'

House for Sale.

What's really in junk food...