Gearhead Humor Gifts

"Tune-up? I think I can bring something to it."

Are you the man who sold me this car?

"She's all outa gumption."

Drool Marks

There's no such thing as a triple carburetor bypass!

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

"What old school? This is my life."

'I said they're good, but expensive.'

"You might be interested in our encounter group for people with transmission problems."

"WOW...this new bike has great acceleration!"

"So this is what you want? This is why after school, almost every day, you spend all your extra free time working at the auto store?"

'According to the diagnostic computer, your problems are due to El Nino.'

'Told you to get your mower fixed.'

'God's speed.'

'Well OF COURSE I rotate the tires! How do you think I got here?'

Smile

"I'd like my daughter to know something about engines."

Idle parts

"An enormous amount of advanced engineering has gone into our latest models. That's not to say, of course, that an enormous amount of advanced engineering hasn't always gone into all our models."

'Just as we finally get the industrial revolution down pat, we find ourselves in the middle of the electronic revolution.'

Car Dentistry.

'I'm afraid you'll have to buy a car, sir -- Braxton, here, accidentally sold your car to somebody else.'

'Mom, dad's toasting the new year with the car again!'

"Well, my paycheck barely pays the bills, I might need a second job, my wife is on my case, and my dad's in the hospital."

Biker At Museum

"Well dudes, gotta go. My honey needs a lot of attention."

'It was only a five minute job. Not worth changing out of his best clothes for'

"They can steal my bike, but they can't take my dignity."

"My name is Leonard, and I'll be your auto mechanic for today."

Army Leader: 'We have ways of making you Torque.'

Tune up $90. Tinker $20.

"It's your oil.....it needs a new car!"

'Hi Terry. Quick question about that new gearbox you put in my Polo last week.'

'Though we understand your feelings towards your automobile, we aren't able to approve your application to marry it.'

'I've got a confession to make dear, I'm The Stig!