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Justice 4 Ron

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

"Objection! Pummelling the witness."

"Your Honor, prior to sentencing, if it please the court, I'd like to make just a few brief remarks about pâte brisée."

'He's not called the 'Hanging About Judge' for nothing.'

Lady Justice.

"Just one more outburst and I can have this chicken tenderized."

'Don't blame the lawyer!'

"Are you trying to show contempt for this court."

Don't You Dare Stand in the Way of Me Standing in My Own Way

"I really wanted to get you off but I didn't want to make a mockery of Justice."

'We the jury find the defendant very, very, very, guilty.'

''Not guilty'? -- oh, in denial, are we?'

'Tell the truth: does this affidavit make me look fat?'

"If they shorten political campaigns, what will we do for entertainment?"

"If the 'Disorderly Conduct' charge is dropped, your Honor, my client will plead guilty to the lesser charge of 'Zany Antics'."

'We've had an application from No.10 Downing Street. . . they need to extend their cabinet room.'

'After counsel said, 'You did it', the defendant said, 'Did not', followed by a, 'Did too'. . .'

Pay Cut for QCs: 'I put it to you that this strikes at the very foundations of justice!'

Gondola safety life jacket demonstration.

'I wonder how my husband is managing at the construction site with my gavel.'

Other than a high chair, what qualifies you to sit in judgment? A lethal gavel.

Artwork in a gallery still has wet paint.

Supreme Court. It's either constitutional or unconstitutional - We don't use a scale of one to ten! (Published previously September 25, 2006.)

'Our new product has increased growth in our legal department.'

'If you don't stay seated, I'll have to use my pop-up blocker.'

"Your Honor, all this pretrial publicity has made my client look fat."

Judge knocking at 'audits' so that 'CPA's' lose their money

Must you be so judgmental?

'I predict they go with an insanity defense.'

"Overruled!"

"Yes I know Dear. Tiger Woods is playing here today!"

"I-800-DOGYLAW"

'I realize that hearsay evidence isn't admissible by the court, Your Honor, but you're going to love this!'