Garden Guard T-Shirts

'An apple a day may keep the doctor away but I prefer to rely on few antipersonnel mines in the garden to do the job.'

Corporate Hornworms

'Harold, when was the last time you cleaned the pool?!'

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

'What's wrong with our new shed? Nothing - I'm sat out here guarding it.'

Garden Gnome fishing all the fish for pond.

"Did I show you my new climbing hydrangea plants, Mr. Fessler?... Mr. Fessler?"

Bumble Bee

'Ok..Ok...I'm putting the lawnmower back in the shed!'

The Gardener's Holiday: Don't leave produce behind you to perish.

Steven had a sneaky suspicion that the local birds were beginning to rely upon here.

Biodiversity

'I'll just put them here until the danger of frost passes - probably next April'

A drooping plant is watered via an IV tube.

'I prefer the term 'mobile home'.'

'It works all the time: Light a candle and dinner comes to you...'

"Relax. They're just crows."

Watering the garden gnome

Beware of the Lawn

"Whoever dug up my carrots had better learn to play dead, fast."

'Not here, Fred.'

I know it's you that's been digging up my garden. I certainly didn't put those rose bushes in.

'...And it comes with valuable coupons toward your next purchase.'

The afternoon shower catches the couple in the tropical garden. The rain shimmers on the flowers that perfume the air. Ryan Beardsley looks into her eyes and whispers. Twig! Watch where you're watering! The humidity begins to affect her mood!

"Nice job with the petunias, Skip. They're a perfect complement to the trip wires."

"Why do humming birds hum? Because they don't know the lyrics."

'Success! I've just hacked into a supposedly squirrel-proof birdfeeder!'

'It's only a slug Norman.'

In paradise

Dog excited watching a new tree being planted

'There's a gleam in his eye!'

"Look, they get really mad when I dig up the garden, so, can you please sign this statutory declaration..."

I think we need stronger slug pellets for the garden!

Pesticide Bunny: Mom! Bunny is eating the pesticide sprayed grass again!

"These hostas are out of control!"