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In a Quandary

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

"Objection! Pummelling the witness."

"Lighten up! Your charts aren't that bad."

'Don't blame the lawyer!'

Sculptor's chippings

Complete Makeover

'And so thanks to my dad's waistline I now understand the theory of our constantly expanding universe!'

A not-so-happy God, with the Humans, sticking an Eviction Notice to the Earth

''Not guilty'? -- oh, in denial, are we?'

'Tell the truth: does this affidavit make me look fat?'

Dad Planet: 'Hey you KIDS! I thought i said no ORBITING in the house!'

"Things will get bad... then there will be an election... then things will get worse."

"You idiot! I said, 'Buy more gold', not mold!!"

'I could have sworn I put those moon rocks in my pocket...'

Cleaning the Horse

'Tell us about the time you met Charles Darwin, grandad.'

Pay Cut for QCs: 'I put it to you that this strikes at the very foundations of justice!'

"Are you sure they'll be able to read English?"

Modern day mirror.

Walking on Water

"What do you mean, 'There can be no ethics without fear of God'?! Look at me - all ethical and shit!"

Expanding Sun engulfs Planets

'I wonder how my husband is managing at the construction site with my gavel.'

'Fake tan, fake hair, fake boobs, - You sound like the real deal - you're hired.'

'Our new product has increased growth in our legal department.'

"I'm gonna make him an offer he could refuse but won't because he's afraid of conflict."

'Today's sermon is on the Gospel according to old Saint Matt....'

Judge knocking at 'audits' so that 'CPA's' lose their money

"That's good for the budget. We don't have to exterminate the humans to conquer the earth. They'll take care of that themselves."