Gallbladder Guru T-Shirts

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

"The bad news is that I backed into a fan. The good news is my owner's a plumber."

"Everything is dandy--and our intestinal biomes are joyous."

"Please don't kill me."

"Objection! Pummelling the witness."

'Don't blame the lawyer!'

'You're looking well.'

"Any improvement since I brought the balloon?"

''Not guilty'? -- oh, in denial, are we?'

'Tell the truth: does this affidavit make me look fat?'

Card: Get Human Soon!

"I'm addicted to water."

Cleaning the Horse

Pay Cut for QCs: 'I put it to you that this strikes at the very foundations of justice!'

"They don't look familiar...probably from another fecal transplant."

'I wonder how my husband is managing at the construction site with my gavel.'

'Our new product has increased growth in our legal department.'

'Yup, might be time for a new gardener.'

Judge knocking at 'audits' so that 'CPA's' lose their money

'Someday one of us will look back on this and laugh.'

"I-800-DOGYLAW"

Yoga

'You must be the new guy! welcome to riding club buddy!'

'I predict they go with an insanity defense.'

"There's 20 billion of us crammed into our capsule world, who's for burrowing south to freedom?"

"Race you to the spleen!"

Friendly bacteria of the human gut.

"Now tell me your legal problem very slowly, with every detail, no matter how irrelevant. Feel free to digress, babble and, especially, backtrack."

'Here, check it by processing my bill.'