Galactic Decorator Pillows

"The globe has landed and waiting for the dust to settle."

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

'Fine stencilling. But have you never thought - Tit Willow, Tit Willow, Tit Willow?'

Painting by the numbers for adults

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

Martha Stewart Takes Over The Universe

Painting the Ceiling

'Frankly, I think watching paint dry has been given a bad press.'

'And just what makes you think I don't know what I'm doing?!!'

'Can I invite my friends round to watch, Mom?'

"We went for Scandinavian interiors."

School Career Choices: Celebrity chef, celebrity gardener,celebrity plumber, celebrity vet, celebrity painter & decorator. . .

Face Painting.

"I'm starting to think stripes."

"On second thought, mabe it would look better over there."

'The roof needs icing.'

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

Michelangelo is painting the Sistine Chapel ceiling and a priest comes to check how he's going - 'Michelangelo, what the hell is that? I just wanted a couple of coats of duck-egg blue!'

'The kids just love doing paint by numbers.'

"I went with weirdness over quantity this year."

"Hon, do you think the accent wall was a mistake?"

'I wanted a change in decor.'

"My pillow mania got out of control so I'm limiting myself to just one at a time."

Cutaway view of house undergoing renovation

"Who should we have at eye level this month?"

'Quick, press control Z!'

Redecorating Easter Island.

'It's not so much the distance to your proposed house site, but that I'm not familiar with your planet's building codes.'

'Oh, Olivia, I just love your new caption! Where on earth did you find it?'

Early cave painters

"Well, I didn't have any more wall space, and I was also tired of being bald."

'Hello, Robinson Crusoe here, I'd like my kitchen finished by Friday.'