Future Tellers Gifts

Cartoonists ideas will end tomorrow.

I just knew this would be dull.

Man enters a palm reading establishment carrying a tropical plant.

Emergency numbers on a telephone.

Anderson Cooper as a Kid. Today, an expose that asks the question: Who IS Simon, and why must we do what he says?

'I see you in five years from now, you're still coming to see me. Do you want me to book the appointments in advance?'

"Something will fall down from the sky and it will be the end of the world - just because you didn't eat all of your carrion for lunch, my boy!"

"What the hell happened to this town?"

"The first thing we should do is get you two into a good mutual fund. Let me get out the 'Magic 8 Ball' and we'll fun some options."

The Very Bad Plot of a Very Bad Ecological Thriller

'My father carried this sign before me, as did his father before him.'

'I used to work for the Treasury Department, but there's no future in economic forecasts.'

"Now...this piece of paper will reveal even more."

'One day, son, all this willy be yours...only by then it will have grown and grown...to hundreds of billions...it's called the cost of PFI.'

Poll: The World Will End With: Nuclear War, Global Warming, Assault Weapons.

COMPAGNIE D'ASSURANCE DE PARIS, 'I can't believe you sold an insurance policy to NOSTRADAMUS!'

Madame Zola - Bitcoin futures

Baby's first text.

"I see that you're very concerned about the rise of AI technology."

Psychic: Palm reading, tarot, and lost and found.

'Would you say this glass is half empty or half full?'

"Someday, God willing, they'll bring the stars down to our eye level so we don't have to strain our necks."

"Dad, how do you become a TV reporter?"

"Time can change everything. Today's security blanket can be tomorrow's superhero cape!"

Your weight and fortune.

"It's a bit of a scam. They sell the crystal ball at cost, then nail you on the price of replacement psych-ink cartridges."

"Those aren't just any old doodles, Ms. Jones, they're notes for my graphic novel!"

"I loved your next book!"

"Don't worry, we research all our 'buy' recommendations."

"Little Miss Muffet sat on a... puppet? Strumpet? Trumpet? Musket, crumpet... I'm the worst children's author ever." Mother Goose struggles...

Psychic near sign: Madam Zoe. Palms read futures told weather forcasts given.

He did not always fit in well with the group think of the other scientists.

'Crystal ball? Do not insult me, madame. Seeing the future is a science.'

'They start texting so young these days,'

'Now might be a good time to tell your wife where you keep your insurance policies.'