Future Linebackers Gifts

NFL linebackers are identified in early infancy and sent away to the secret academy until puberty.

Football Fans

'There they go - off on their own - and a finer bunch of fledgelings one couldn't ask.'

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

'Let's throw ball. Running game not working.'

'I'm not playing 'Bride and Groom' unless you sign this pre-nuptial aggreement!'

Exercising

"One day, I'll be the first woman!"

"Gracie, I'm proud of you. Your team lost, but you tried your best and that's all that counts."

Children playing football.

'If you are not careful, son, you will be mathematically eliminated from all of the Ivy League schools.'

A boy with a football

'Dad, are you sure this is building the right muscles for football?'

"She's always been a quick learner."

"We'll see who wins on Sunday, and more importantly, if we'll hear 'Not Like Us' at halftime."

"It's your turn, kid."

'Yale's my first choice but any ivy school will do.'

'Wow! Feel that kick! I'm buying him a football for his first birthday!'

'Not everyone can make it as a professional footballer!' 'I know dad, there are snooker and darts players...'

"Papi, will I be the first in our family to go to college?"

'Save some purrs for when I play quarterback for the Saints.'

'Don't feel bad. Maybe your son is just a late bloomer.'

'My long-range goal is to turn pro and lead the league in T.V. commercials!'

'My Dad said I'll be an international goalkeeper when I grow up!'

'...But my stupid parents said no!!'

'The teacher gave me a 'B' for coloring outside the lines. At this rate, I'll never get into Harvard!'

'Are you the person I see about getting a sign-up bonus and a salary?'

"Congratulations, your baby is a footballer...!"

"No, you can't go sledding. It's too dangerous and besides, you have football practice."

'I just felt it kick again, Charlie - I think he's going to be a football superstar!'