Future Blogger Gifts

"She wrote a diary, not a blog."

No, you idiots, they don't include a "comments" section.

"Just bring me something that's going to look good on social media."

Press Freedom

A is for App...B is for Blogger...C is for Celebrity.

"Stinkin' fake news!"

'Homepage Sweet Homepage'

Snoopy with Laptop

"Looking at you, the moon and beyond, don't you think we could start a blog?"

Whoa

"I call it 'rage loaf'."

'This is too small. Get me a 12...How many times?! I'm a 10 or a 12 on top and a 12 or 14 on the bottom depending on the shop, the cut of the fabric, the ambient air temperature, and the rotation of Pluto...and we always try the 10 first capiche?'

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, Kevin. You need to know them so you can Blog.'

"I've decided to cut out the middleman and self-publish."

Ruddy bloggers!

'She posted her first blog today.'

Multi-Tasking

'I didn't think of it as someone else writing my term paper, I thought of it more as a guest blogger situation.'

'I've got no problem with December, but what do I blog about the rest of the year?'

'Sorry, but we're not compatible, Jim. You keep a diary, and I blog on the Internet.'

'Fetching newspapers is over. Now I aggregate blogs for him.'

'Those enormous worldwide internet communities.'

"A naked dress is perfect when you have nothing to wear."

Anderson Cooper as a Kid. Today, an expose that asks the question: Who IS Simon, and why must we do what he says?

'Oh no! Is this a blogger I saw before me?'

"Perhaps more people would give heed unto the word of the Lord if the Lord had a funny blog."

'I won't be writing this year, you can find my list on my blog.'

"'C' is for free CONTENT!"

"We don't have to worry about being quiet until we're old enough to read that sign."

"I've been listening to your podcast. And though I agree with your opinion on deforestation and global warming, I strongly disagree with your claim that I overcook my pasta."

"What made you start blogging about success?"

Witches of Instagram

"Honey, come quick! This guy in the comments section just solved the Middle East crisis."

Creativity 2.0

'Your tweets have quite a following.'