Furry Friend Trainer Gifts

'I said shake, not squeeze!'

"I forsee you will have a better chance of winning the lottery than growing your testicles back."

Beware of the Dog Hair.

Pavlov's Puppy

"Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you were my dog Willie."

Pet psychic -- yup, she's for real.

"But this time, Lucky, when I throw the ball... you bring it back!"

'You think it's easy, being married to a man who thinks of nothing but his work?'

'Next!'

'I think he got embarrassed because of the sweater. . . Another dog started laughing. I told him it was just wheezing, but he wasn't buying it.'

'I can tell you one thing, Madam. These ears have been neglected...

'Before I undertake my journey, I require you to make me a warrior's headband.'

"And always remember...If you're going to be sick, always do it on the carpet. It's more absorbent."

"Hold my calls for a while, Wilson."

"Owning a pet is a big responsibility, not to mention never wearing dark clothing again."

'Can't one eat in peace!'

"Do you prefer lavender scent or strawberry?"

'Ben has his own cute little ways to show his dislike for dry food.'

"Yes, I came back. I always come back."

"English: Walk?" "Dog hears: Edibles on the sidewalk!"

Hal is such a nice guy, every dog in the neighborhood brings him slippers.

"OK, so just to recap: Small bowl is you, big bowl is me."

'I would love to play in your tree-house, but I can't climb trees...'

'You know, I almost envy you sometimes.'

"This is the best news."

Work out buddies.

'Hunger is a terrible thing, especially around dinner time!'

Winter walk.

"I wonder if the dumb obedience school gives a warranty..."

"Murchison’s theory is that it’s dog hair in your fuel line.”

Stuff nervous little dogs yap about.

"Guess who's the 'rendered'."

'Must be worms, huh, Doc?'

"I got you the same thing."

'I think he wants to go walkies!'