Furniture Makeover Artist T-Shirts

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

"I agree, the place was a tear-down, but I just remembered we were only renting it."

Four Common Lampshade Mistakes and How To Avoid Them.

"I said to myself, 'Maybe I can't change the world, but I can remodel my bathroom.' "

'Never mind about buying that trampoline. I love your new bed!'

'We want it painted the colour of money!'

"We needed to replace our kitchen floor and it kind of grew from there."

'You had to put a skylight in didn't you?'

'For our next party, let's invite a carpenter, a painter and an upholsterer so they can help us clean up afterward.'

'I wanted a change in decor.'

"Hon, do you think the accent wall was a mistake?"

'So, how much to remove this ugly old tree? $1750. It's not THAT ugly.'

"Hello, and welcome to 'Homes Under the Hammer. . .'"

'For heaven's sake Janet - where have you disappeared to now?'

'Letting him buy the stupid guns was the only way I'd ever get him to paint the house.'

"Ok Mr. Bisley, I'll admit it does need a bit of renovation..!"

"Honey, look-those are the tiles I was thinking about for the kitchen."

"Would you go nuts if I paint EVERYTHING pink!?"

'Hmmmm...lower.'

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

Yellow Fever: What you may catch if your painter sneezes.

"You've done an absolutely fabulous job with the house, Anne, and Gordon's so improved!"

"I've changed my mind"

"Well, you could wish for a new kitchen and a bathroom renovation; or alternatively you could just wish for a less idle husband."

"When does the improvement part of this improvement project kick in?"

'They had a sale on electric green.'

"I've decided to replace the sod floor with tile."

Planner at work.

'We could either give you a $50,000 home improvement loan, or $2,000 to just blow your house up.'

'What paste?' (Husband nailing wallpaper to the wall).

"We're thinking Shag Carpet. I'm tired of hardwood floors."

Football addict

"Be honest...did you actually get any paint on the living room walls?"

'Buy this house sir, and you could be a star in a DIY make-over programme!'