Furniture Fanatics Gifts

'Sorry Dad, but my true passion is for making furnitures, not dams...'

'I like modern. It never goes out of style.'

"Jeffrey makes all our furniture himself."

"This was probably an early Father's Day gift."

Memory Foam Mattress.

Budget Recliner

'We've moved some fussy people, but she tops it!'

"Do you have any caffeine free coffee tables?"

Luca Barocco's Cannoli Sectional

"I forget now, but one of these buttons opens the chair back to full recline."

Ikea Flat Pack Children: Do not assemble till 18 years old.

Reproduction Furniture

'This is where I'm thinking of putting my husband.'

PsIkeatrist.

'No, I've not been re-arranging the furniture again, you and your wife moved last week!'

"Do you know what DFS stands for? Designed for Scratching."

"The 'razor sharp shards of glass' feature is a controversial new addition to our range of easy chairs."

"OK, I'll let you in, but remember: If you scratch it, you buy it!"

"Ralph's totally useless as a husband, but he makes a great futon."

"Rags, I told you not to let Larry up on the furniture."

You're putting it together? Are you new here? IKEA Elves.

Phil's House O' Furniture. I can't find the map chests.

Downer Chairs.

"Bailey! What part of 'never jump on the Stickley' don't you understand?!"

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

"I realize we had to liquidate some assets, but don't you think I'd be more productive if I had a desk?"

"Man's best friends."

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

Four Common Lampshade Mistakes and How To Avoid Them.

Name one serious woodworker who doesn't use state of the art kit. Thomas Chippendale.

"This new chair has the smoothest 360 swivel action on the market!"

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

"Get... a-nother room!"

'This one's good if you like to toss and turn all night.'

'I had no idea Ikea had been around so long.'