Furniture Critic Gifts

"And my lawyer says we have a hell of a case against La-Z-Boy."

'I forgot to warn you they got wicker chairs.'

"Dios mio! That couch is toooo soft!"

'Not to change the subject, but does this sofa seem lumpy to you?'

"Man's best friends."

"If you could be any Bob Dylan you wanted to, which Bob Dylan would you be?"

"Bloody hell!"

"I'm sorry, we're looking for the voice of a spunky animated turnip and your reading is more fruit than vegetable if you understand what I mean."

Kritik's Korner

'Amazing! We truly do live in a classless society.'

"All of a dither as per usual!"

'Teens are like trees, you can chart their growth by the number of rings.'

"That shirt is so last year."

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

'Dang, you were right! It is formal!'

'What about you...you've been living here thirty years too?'

Caveman invents an armchair and his dog sits in it.

"Yes, but I'll know it's a recliner."

"How come in these days of downsizing and lower expectations, all these sneakers come with ridiculously long laces?"

Workout clothes: 'One size fits none.'

"Well, your feng shui isn't my feng shui."

Non-Uniform Day Today.

Pam learned the importance of browser support.

Downside of a memory foam mattress.

"Well, do you want to buy this sofa or not? You've been on it for three days!"

"Don't these fools realize they're violating every principle of feng-shui?"

Don't touch that dial! — We're experts, and we know what you should be watching!

The Piano Dreams Of Home

Ok, now the Swedish mouse is just showing off. IKEA maze.

'It's a coffee-book table.'

"Darling! We've become armchair socialites."

'Did they deliver the new couch today?'

"Well I have to go, my ride is here."

"China now says it will withdraw its opposition to the missile-defense shield if the F.B.I. builds it."

"I watched a Lassie marathon today and realized that I really need to step up my game."