Funny Print Fan Gifts

Pine tree driving a truck with a human-shaped air freshener hanging off the mirror

"I've put on a few ounces, but it's mostly paperweight."

The Age of Reptiles. . .

Dr. Frankenstein creates his newest monster, Frankenmime.

Oh yeh? Well at least he doesn't get fleas.

'Aren't you glad we brought our putters, too?'

'Yes, it's just a little volume.'

Edvard Grieg

Wind turbine and leaf blower.

Antler Buzzers.

"Teenagers! Everyone try to look cool!"

Never give a cow a giant straw.

'You should work for Conglomo. You're allowed the vegetable of your choice.'

'I mean, what sort of thief only takes a dog bowl?'

"Did you ask for the large print edition?"

Shaman reads magazine entitled 'Witch Doctor'.

Good stripper cop / Bad stripper cop

'...and what's more, they're all first editions.'

'We only have one brand of beer, but we've got six kinds of flavor straws.'

Toast kidnapper.

'Another artisanal B&B.'

During our summer breaks, hungry photocopiers from across the nation migrate to the richer feeding grounds of Pulp & Paper Mill country.

'Bloomin rare breeds.'

'The Ugoola's wheel is bigger than ours!'

'Mr. Pennrose isn't so bad...when he gives someone a pink slip, he always draws a smiley face on it.'

House for Sale.

'I stopped you so I could find out where you got that great outfit.'

101 uses of a dead cat: toilet brush

Blind Cyclist

"I bagged a couple of ducks and a drone."

Accountant Peacock