Funny Golf Strategist Gifts

"In this tournament we have created a different level of difficulty."

Donald Trump Playing Golf With Hair On Fire

It is best dealt with by the 'Pitch and Run Shot'.

Golfer to other: 'I've never seen anyone slice a putt before.'

'I don't think there's any hope for my golf game.'

Helicopter dropping golf balls onto a green.

"You're way too strong Dad: You've overshot the green by about two hundred metres..."

"This may seem counter intuitive, but maybe the solution is to lighten up."

'I read that the ball is on the surface of the club for just 0.00035 of a second, so even when you take 100 shots to go around, you are only getting less than 1 second of golf for your money...'

'All my children have been successful. Frank here is in the Oval Office.'

'You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!'

'Wait! Better give me the big one.'

Golf Score Reducer

Golf Hil Divot

'If you want to improve your golf score, the best wood to use is a pencil with an eraser.'

Dieter Miller veloped the talking golf ball to call out when lost in the rough. But... (ouch, ouch, ouch)

"I enjoy the game so much more since they invented the self-driving ball!"

'Now, Perkins, hit my ball straight down the fairway for about 300 yards.'

Tiger Woods, on his way to his 1st golf tournament.

'One of the quickest ways to meet people is to pick up the wrong ball.'

Golf Myth #293--Ball Washer

"I've never seen a gimme taken on a fareway before."

'Have you got a sand wedge?'

"In this situation, I'd suggest a 5-word sentence with an action verb but hold the exclamation mark."

'I know Joe's sight isn't all that but the captain's not going to like it.'

'I remember Rod when he used to strike footballs into the crowd!'

For a $50 payoff, Dwayne would agree not to follow a foursome around all 18 holes.

"... And how much am I bid for this set of, John McEnroe's golf clubs?"

'I'll be with you in a minute.'

TOLD YOU TO TAKE LESSONS FROM GOLF PRO

Mulligan's first mulligan.

'Tell me the truth,Rodney - you've moved the hole haven't you!'

"There are some folks waiting to play through."

'We plan to introduce bodychecking and fistfights to the game.'

I've had a fantastic round, I've even got a ball left over!