Funny Glasses Wearer Gifts

'Time you got those glasses changed Fred. . .'

'No. The television screen hasn't gone red - You've got tomato ketchup all over your glasses!'

"Keep your glasses on. It will look like twice as much."

They get into debt so fast these days...

"I think you've overfed the plant!"

Cat on Computer Keyboard.

'Don't worry...you'll grow into them.'

'A free goldfish with every house you buy!'

Lost and Found - 'Nothing yet.' (Zebra has lots its stripes).

Hissy-fits for sale.

"I'm going to have to ask you to accompany me to the Police Station!"

'I think the eye doctor got my prescription glasses mixed up with somebody else's.'

'Yes I can talk, can you fly?'

Beard, socks and sandals.

'You're not from around here, are you?'

'Dr. Nackschmerz has a very logical mind.' - 'Yes - in contrast to his body.'

'He was a lousy watch dog until we realized he was near sighted.'

Evil Pusskins #9

'My eyesight was getting worse, but thanks to my new glasses, I can play 'Monkey see, Monkey do' again...'

"Now these prescription glasses are popular with our clients who like to be stylish yet lay low."

Beer Belly/Vodka Elbow

'No thanks, just squinting.'

Contacts vs. Glasses

Father Goldfish: 'One day Son, this will all be yours.'

Horse costume.

Policeman charges tortoise for impersonation.

'She tried diet after diet - the, at last, we hit on something that works . . .'

Short sighted pirates being turned away from a Pilates class.

'I'd like to buy a vowel.'

"It's four pounds a night, and one hour treadmill time..."