Funny Gift Moment Gifts

Garden Centre - "...she thinks she's getting a mink coat!"

At home with the Bones...one skeleton yells at the dog chewing his leg, 'now cut that out!'

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

"I've put on a few ounces, but it's mostly paperweight."

Labrador Non-retriever

"Captain, we've taken on strippers."

"Great news! Jim at work's promised to lend me all his World Cup DVDs"

Cat on Computer Keyboard.

Solitaire card shark.

"Ma'am, do you realize how fast you were... going?"

Bagel problems.

'A free goldfish with every house you buy!'

A giant cat sleeps fitfully with four humans on the bed

"I'm going to have to ask you to accompany me to the Police Station!"

Hissy-fits for sale.

'You're not from around here, are you?'

'He's not leaving, but if we collect enough, he might.'

'This milk smells funny.'

'My graduation gown got lost at the cleaners. Think anyone will notice this Snuggie?'

'I'm sorry, buddy, but I ran out of bandicoots around Belgium.'

Beer Belly/Vodka Elbow

'Re-gifting has become socially acceptable, dear, but re-carding is going a little too far.'

"You ain't gitting on this train until I git off first."

"It's four pounds a night, and one hour treadmill time..."

"You do realize she's not your real mother."

What are you doing? - 'I've set up an e-commerce site.' - 'What are you selling?' - 'Signed copies of my old boxer shorts.' - 'Washed £7. Unwashed £23.' - 'Yeah, baby. Market forces.' -

'First time fly fishing?'

I think the best part was when we decided not to record it.

A.I. Newreader Malfunctions. . . or does it?

"Earbuds are tiny headphones."

When I said, Do you want to go out> I meant to pee, not on a date.

An old man with a ball and chain attached to his zimmer frame

"Sorry Rudolph, this year I'm going with Steve and his sweet disco ball nose."

Helicopter as a clothes drier

Man with an umbrella hat looks at man with a hat umbrella.