Funny Gift Guru Gifts

Beach con-man.

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

Peephole in a pile of presents (colour).

Van Gogh was starting to run out of gift ideas.

At home with the Bones...one skeleton yells at the dog chewing his leg, 'now cut that out!'

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

"I can't imagine why we didn't think of this before."

Santa called but you were out!

"He won't eat anything but corn."

It's a busy mother's day down there! The glucose molecule got his mom a box of sweets, the histamine brought flowers ... A sodium atom got bath salts, and the genes had a family portrait taken. Frank, the neuron didn't get a gift for his mother. No, he didn't but he always sends a nice message!

Regifts of the Magi

"I think you've overfed the plant!"

Valentines Day truck

"Great news! Jim at work's promised to lend me all his World Cup DVDs"

C'mon, help me out! Which rock do you think my kids would like better?

Gastroenterology - Pull Finger For Service.

Cat on Computer Keyboard.

Mother using candy cane to pull son away from toy window.

Solitaire card shark.

'A free goldfish with every house you buy!'

"I'm going to have to ask you to accompany me to the Police Station!"

A giant cat sleeps fitfully with four humans on the bed

Hissy-fits for sale.

'Times are hard so these will have to be presents for Christmas and birthday combined!'

'He's not leaving, but if we collect enough, he might.'

'You're not from around here, are you?'

"I'm sorry, but until you tell me what you do want for Christmas, you'll keep on getting cats."

'This milk smells funny.'

'What can you suggest for a young lady who thinks she has everything?'

'My graduation gown got lost at the cleaners. Think anyone will notice this Snuggie?'

Fish building a bomb to save themselves.

Beer Belly/Vodka Elbow

'I'm sorry, buddy, but I ran out of bandicoots around Belgium.'

Gift Ideas. What I get for a man who already has everything? Insurance!

"Do you have all those things in stock?"