Gifting Guru Gifts

And then, exactly one month later, re-gifting was invented.

"We all chipped in and got you some thank you cards."

Peephole in a pile of presents (colour).

"Happiness is to unwrap something special on Christmas."

Beach con-man.

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

Van Gogh was starting to run out of gift ideas.

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

Cat Reunion

"I can't imagine why we didn't think of this before."

Santa called but you were out!

"He won't eat anything but corn."

It's a busy mother's day down there! The glucose molecule got his mom a box of sweets, the histamine brought flowers ... A sodium atom got bath salts, and the genes had a family portrait taken. Frank, the neuron didn't get a gift for his mother. No, he didn't but he always sends a nice message!

'You brought gold? I thought we agreed to a twenty dollar limit?'

Regifts of the Magi

C'mon, help me out! Which rock do you think my kids would like better?

Valentines Day truck

"I'll match donations when you match my tax payments."

Gastroenterology - Pull Finger For Service.

Mother using candy cane to pull son away from toy window.

"Will you only promise the children toys that can be brought at this store?"

"In this company, Simmons, we hold our hands steady in the middle and shake our bodies."

'Last week I got a lovely watch for my wife!'

"Pot of gold?! Nobody uses cash these days! Do you fancy a couple of gift cards?"

'I hope you came with a receipt.'

"It's an adjustment being a handshake guy in a fist-bump company."

'Times are hard so these will have to be presents for Christmas and birthday combined!'

Honey badger do care.

'My holiday season: A rich tradition of belated giving and premature babbling.'

'Year after year I play Santa, and I still don't know how to give.'

"Do you have all those things in stock?"

'I like going to parties - invited or not.'

"I'll have all that, and this."

"I'm sorry, but until you tell me what you do want for Christmas, you'll keep on getting cats."

I know 'enjoy the day' is the latest trendy, trite pleasantry, but in this store, we stick with the classic, 'Have a nice day'.