Funeral-themed Collectibles Gifts

Undertaker's Staff Party (drinks are on the hearse).

He looks so natural lying there...

'He loved that dog.'

"We are gathered here to morn the passing of Bob Opossum."

"Promise me that if I die first you won't eat me."

'He was hosting a business dinner for 300. Those were his last words.'

"That's not a progress chart, that's the bosses salary chart!"

'He's a conspiracy theorist - he refuses to believe that Great Aunt Mildred is really dead.'

"He intends to die with dignity, he desires a modest funeral, and he's determined to prevent the buzzards from getting any part of the estate."

"Right before I die I'm going to swallow a bag of popcorn kernels."

'He always said he wouldn't be seen dead with his shirt outside his trousers - he'll be livid.'

"You must forgive me, I seem to have misplaced my spectacles... Does the best man have the ring?"

A dead business executive is lowered into the grave with his desk

Dead Man's Handel

"I know I agreed to hold a funeral for Wendy's goldfish...but did she have to ask Reverend Clark to officiate?"

Undertaker's Flower Box.

"As always he found a way to duck out of working overtime!"

"Rate your experience and you could win an Amazon gift voucher."

A signaller directing pallbearers

"We need to talk about your driving. Some of your passengers have been complaining."

'He was a shooting star, passing through the firmament. Lighting up our dull lives with his all too brief presence.' 'I think we're at the wrong funeral.'

Priest gives the last rites to an expired metre.

"His last wish was that we delete his browsing history."

'I tend to bury stuff.'

“Sorry, we don’t accept the living dead.”

At the funeral of the amazing Voltar.

Bear Bears his Cross

"Is it me, or does the old man still look angry at us for denting his Cadillac?"

Funeral for a Cartoonist

"I think Republicans and Democrats alike can agree that Frank Shustermann is dead."

'I remember baptising him when he was a baby, and that was the last I saw of him until he rolled in here today.'