Fun-loving Mother Gifts

For mom's birthday, Dylan wanted to surprise her by making breakfast in bed.

"I’ve tried to make this as painless as possible ... clearly I’ve failed."

"Look Mommy, hat!"

'She's just great with the children.'

'That'll be four twenty for the beers and sixty quid for the Xmas decorations.'

"Mom! Don't think of me as covered with sand. Think of me as sugar coated."

"Can I have another sausage Dad?"

"Werewolves of London..."

'I go to St. Patrick's Church, I go to St. Patrick's School, and my name is Patrick. Is it also necessary for me to eat green food?'

"Have mercy on me, Mama. Have mercy on Mr. Pitiful."

"Whose turn is it to lick the knife?"

Pappa clown views offspring in maternity window.

'I was an egg in the Easter play.'

'Care to gaze upon the peaceful blanket of snow before I send the kids out?'

Kangaroo - Mum dropping her ice-cream on Joey's head.

Baby tells other Baby to call.

'A generous layer of vaseline makes an excellent tickle repellent!'

'If you can keep him clean for a day you can sleep in his bed tonight.'

'Where do I put the batteries?'

What do you want, the moon on a stick?

"You have a co-pay...two cookies and a glass of milk."

Circus Act

'Hi Dad. I want you to meet Mr. Hacketal, my attorney.'

"Well, my dog cleans himself that way!"

'We're playing trampoline, mom.'

"A simple note from your mother would have sufficed, Tommy."

'Look Daddy: I'm wearing Mummy's shoes...'

Jeff's Smorgasbord

Real Estate Krisp Flakes: Location! Location! Location!

"Wheeeeeeee!"

Skateboard

"Hell, Mom! How's it look?!" "Holy mackerel."

“Hands, Rachel. Clap your hands. Why on earth would I say, ‘If you’re happy and you know it, slap Sam’?”

"We're playing doctor and I need 50 cents for my co-pay."