Frustration Fighter Pillows

"Have you tried doing the thing you just told me you tried?"

'It's not that I don't like the product. I can't get it out of the package.'

Patience Tested While You Wait.

'...thanks for calling. You will now getting kicked out of the line.'

Self Checkout

"Yes, I know what's going on in the world. That's still no excuse for my Internet being down all day."

'What's this bank charge of £35?'

'Welcome to the Customer Disservice line.'

"And for my next trick, I shall attempt to open a supermarket carrier bag without losing my temper."

"You estimated wait time before you hang up in frustration is 19 minutes."

Road Rage

"To escape from our absurdly complicated and annoying phone mail system, press star 2 and have a major credit card ready."

"If you are angry at being kept on hold, press 1, if you are furious press 2, if you are apoplectic with rage ..."

Twisted Peel attempts to make a complaint to a customer services call centre.

'Wow, I really feel better already!'

'But does your GPS send you into a homicidal rage trying to fold it?'

He was always losing it.

"Call me 'dude' again! I dare you! I double-dare you, Alexander! Call me 'dude' one more goddamned time!"

'Hello, Tech Support?'

'To figuratively pound your fist into a wall in frustration because you've reached a pre-recorded message, press the 'pound' key. That's what it's for.'

"After giving them the runaround for five minutes, pass them on to anger management."

To hear Muzak while on hold, press "1." T have a spike driven into your ear, press "2." To end this call, press "3." To end your life, press "4."

"The problem with these instructions is that they assume I have the attention span to actually read something."

Tangled Earphones Support Group.

"Is 'disgusted with the whole lot of them' a choice?"

Pounding speeds up the computer.

Through Traffic Keep Left/We're Through Traffic Keep Right

'... Further to our telephone conversation of the 3rd, my fax of the 11th, my letters of the 16th, 23rd and 28th, my emails of....'

"This new system is too complex...pass it on."

You May Bang Your Head Here/You May Talk To Here.

Broken since March

Paper being carefully folded until it resembles a scrunched up paper ball.

"Appointments. Disappointments."

"Just pick one!! We're already late!!"

Music Quiz